Do you have the 3 month or 3 year “curse”?

Do your relationships never get QUITE as far along as you’d like?

If so, there’s a pretty good chance your relationships are getting decimated by self-sabotage.

This is SCARY, because you’ve probably worked hard to get that date, or the second date, or the 2nd month of dating…

Scary because you’ve probably thought “he was the one” only to have him pull away for good.

Scary because you might think “but I’m doing everything right!”

There is a part of ALL of us that says “why does this happen to me?”…

That says “it’s TOO hard”

That says “HE’S a jerk”

And that part can engulf us if we’re not careful. And take us out of the “game” so to speak of love and dating.

Good news though…

Beyond the victim, the crossed arms, the “this always happens to me” energy, is something much deeper calling out…calling out for

Compassionate Change.

Without compassion, we’ll take action but it won’t be effective and our mind will “hunt us down” and re-create the same circumstances.

Like a fish with one fin, swimming in circles (sadly I saw this in Thailand on a dock waiting for our boat to the next island…I found it very perplexing and so often like what we see in humanity)

And without change, we’ll be complacent. We’ll be tied to “I’m doing my best” and other excuses for staying stuck.

Like a dinosaur, we won’t adapt until it’s too late 🙂

If you want to rid your relationships of self-sabotage (aka victim energy), make compassionate change…

Learn to set a healthy boundary.

Learn to soothe your inner child and inner critic (what some people call our self-saboteur).

Learn to improve your communication.

Now you could spend years — even decades — doing this in therapy…and never quite get there.

Or you could change it in just three months with inner work, practical skills, and world-class support.

But that is possible if and only if you listen to the part of you that’s screaming for love, and tell your inner critic to shut up.

Xoxo, Violet

PS If you want compassionate change in your love life, and you want it NOW, I’d love to connect. We offer 45 minute Breakthrough to Love sessions for passionate women ready to move on in their love life. If that’s you, pick out a spot here:


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