What’s your ideal Sunday?
Brunch with friends? Sleeping in late with your husband? A romantic picnic?
I used to dread Sundays
Not just because they meant that Monday was around the corner,
But because by that time in the weekend I was really sick of being alone.
For the women I talk to, even when they’re hustling after their dreams in career, community, travel, and fitness,
there’s an ache inside to be loved fully and to fully give their heart.
There’s a flatness they feel to having it all on the outside, but not feeling deeply claimed on the inside.
They might be masking this by being “busy”, or telling themselves it doesn’t matter, or by being overtly sexy without integrating their heart.
The feminine longs to be cherished, to be seen, and to be connected through love.
Unlike the masculine, which says “once my life is solid, THEN I’ll make room for a partner,”
The feminine says “when I’m with my partner and living in love, everything in life feels easier, richer, and happier.”
But so many women go about this backwards.
They build the perfect resume and hope he shows up.
They mis-understand (or aren’t aware of) what the masculine truly wants.
And they take on more and more masculine qualities like predicting, analyzing, and controlling.
OR, they choose the wrong partner — a partner who’s more in his feminine and who lacks integrity, dependability, and strength.
Now we all have masculine and feminine energy in us, by design,
so there’s no shame if you’ve found yourself in this cycle of wanting to be perfect before opening your heart…
Or if you’ve found yourself picking men who aren’t “good enough” for you, to avoid potential rejection and to give you a fake sense of control.
But if you truly want a love that lasts, and the pleasure of simply relaxing and trusting a good guy,
Then it’s time for a new approach.
When my client Melinda came to me, she was so sick of dating…
Despite her best efforts, she was attracting men who didn’t value her,
men who wanted to keep things “casual” or unspoken, and men who just didn’t measure up to her vision of her dream guy.
The men she did like were put off by her, and instead seemed to flirt with her friends.
She was ready to give up.
And was so sick of giving away her power.
As we started our work together, Melinda was initially skeptical that my system and tools would work for her.
But she gave it a try anyway…
And within 2 weeks she was dating again, but with a WAY better experience.
Over the course of 12 weeks, four different men pursued her.
Each man got better than the last — more successful, more communicative, and more aligned with her desire for a healthy love.
She stayed in her power while enjoying how fun, easy, and connected it was…
And she said no to the men who weren’t the best fit…
Leaving just one guy left — a man who asked for her wish-list for her birthday,
A man who wanted to meet her family,
A man who has incredible integrity and values, whom she trusts.
They’re going bowling on Sunday, and I know they’re going to have a great time!
Because I can tell when my clients have hit the jackpot, and it lights me up inside.
I know how balanced she is, how much he likes her, and I can see that she’s already integrated all the tools I teach, and it’s transformed not only her love life, but all of her relationships.
For me, Sunday means that lazy peaceful feeling of being supported…
It means Jason rubbing aloe into my back because I was at the beach too long…
It means reminiscing about our dinner party last night, and how much we love our tribe.
If you’re ready to REALLY look forward to the weekend (and romantic trips and simple pleasures with your person),
Then you have a choice to do things differently and get a drastically different experience with love.
It doesn’t have to be full of effort.
It can be FUN, and easy like Sunday 🙂
Xoxo, Violet
PS if you’ve decided you’re done with dating the old way and are ready to receive your forever partner, let’s talk. This is not for everyone though — this is only for women who are coachable and open to a different approach…if that’s you, awesome! Go ahead and set up your free Breakthough to Love session now and we’ll fit you in this week: www.violetlange.com/apply.
