I want to share today a crazy part of my story you haven’t heard before…
When I was 19 at a retreat in college they asked us to share our greatest fear.
At that time in my life, nearly 20 years ago, I felt so unlovable.
Deep down I felt unworthy and broken.
My greatest fear was that I would never get married, never be chosen.
Can you relate?
This led to a big problem…
On my first date with Matt, a year after that retreat, I thought “oh my god, this guy is so boring”…
But, I kept going out with him, despite the unsettled feeling in my heart.
A year and a half later we were married.
Why? I chose safety over love.
This is what happens when we operate out of fear.
This is what happens when we haven’t healed from the past or from rocky childhoods.
Did Matt and I have some good times too?
Absolutely.
But what you might not know is that I was drinking an entire bottle of wine in just an hour some nights.
We went YEARS without having intimacy.
I became his mother.
He became my pet.
We had a condo in a high-rise downtown, I had a great corporate job, and we looked “happy” from the outside.
But inside I was dying.
After 5 years, we got a divorce.
Dating after that was a disaster.
I had built my love life around the needs of my scared inner child. I didn’t know who I was as a woman, or what I even wanted.
That time in my life felt like a black hole.
I tried everything under the sun to heal and to attract love. But most of it didn’t work.
The turning point?
When I started to take Fearless Feminine Action.
Now I’m married to Jason, the man of my dreams…I literally met him in my dream 3 weeks before we met in real life!
We have an insanely amazing life together:
traveling every month, living in an amazing city, working together to help men and women find and keep love.
We’re even beginning to plan for baby and getting pregnant 🙂
None of this would have happened without a serious reboot in my love life.
In fact it took 10 years to make all of that happen.
But if you’re willing to learn and change, and to take Fearless Feminine Action, you can have a great love in just months, and don’t have to go through what I did.
Look back on your relationship history.
Which part of you has been choosing your partners?
The adult, grown-up Queen part of you?
Or the scared or rebellious or people-pleasing little girl part of you?
Facing your fears isn’t easy. But it is actually pretty simple.
When my clients start to take my Four Fearless Feminine Actions,
They find their inner Queen.
And they get into great relationships which are built on LOVE not fear.
It took me 10 years to find my second husband, because I didn’t have anyone showing me the way.
I don’t want you to have to wait that long.
If you’re ready for the most pleasurable, supportive, and fun transformation,
It’s almost half-way through 2018, but this can still be your year for love.
Xoxo, Violet
PS if you’re ready for a real love leading to marriage, and ready to build a solid foundation within yourself as you attract a great partner, let’s talk. I do a few Breakthrough to Love sessions each week for women who are ultra committed and hungry to get past their fear and find their inner Queen. It’s free and the best 45 minutes you’ve ever spent on your love life. Just pick out a time here: www.violetlange.com/talk
