Have you ever gone on 5 or 6 online dates in a row where there was no spark?
And you started to wonder,
What’s wrong with me?
Have you ever tried your best to make your profile stand out, only to attract strange dudes?
And you started to wonder,
Where are all the smart, successful, dependable guys?
Have you ever let the frustration of a bad date or no-call-back affect your mood for days?
And you started to wonder,
Was he really not interested after we had such great conversation?
There are three major problems with online dating. Do you:
- Attract (or choose) the wrong person?
- Repel the right person accidentally or don’t get a second date?
- Lose confidence after weeks or months of nothing working out?
There are certain things in life that are hard to solve…health issues, natural disasters, accidents.
But dating isn’t one of them.
1– You CAN change what you’re expressing — in your words and pictures and even in your vibration — and get feedback on it immediately in the type of men responding to you and asking you out.
2– You CAN change how you’re expressing yourself — so you’re not pushing great guys away by your tone or words and wondering why he never texted again.
3– You CAN increase your confidence date by date — so the process gets even more fun and even more fruitful…plus meet more guys in person, and more importantly, find a lasting, loving connection.
But most women try to analyze their love life in a vacuum.
They feel shy talking about online dating, or maybe deep down they feel ashamed they’re still single after everyone else seems taken.
Sticking your head in the sand won’t help you though, and neither will going on more online dates when that strategy isn’t working for you.
In most parts of life, when we have a problem, we seek an expert (car mechanic, dentist, the Apple store :))
Why would dating and love be any different?
Well, it’s not.
Sure, you can keep doing what you’re doing, hoping it gets better…maybe with the “help” of a few bitter, single girlfriends, or even worse, married friends who don’t know Tinder from Bumble…
But what is that costing you?
Time, energy, and confidence…?
What are you really missing out on?
Feeling desired and cherished and chosen…?
What are you putting off until you have a partner?
A romantic trip, a new home, or starting a family…?
I’m going to say something probably a bit upsetting, but it’s really the truth…
If you have a problem that can be solved and you’re not solving it, that’s an epic waste of your time.
I get it if you’re nervous — most of us are when we make a change.
I get it if you’re not sure how — that’s why there are experts.
And I even get it if you’re tired or despondent — months or years online dating will do that to anyone.
But what I don’t get is why you wouldn’t make a change if what you’re doing isn’t getting you the love you want.
What you need is a system that works, like a recipe.
Even though I’ve helped women go from single to married, the key ingredient in this love recipe isn’t me. It’s you.
Your willingness to show up for yourself.
Your willingness to learn new things.
Your willingness to ask for help.
It all starts with YOUR yes. And taking back your courage and pride and confidence from the online dating, well, shit show.
Do you want to do it alone, forever? Or would you like to find an easier way?
Xoxo, Violet
P.S. I’d love to see if we can help, but first I have to see if it’s a good fit. I will need to know what’s going on with you, what you’ve tried that hasn’t worked, and more importantly, what it is you’re looking for (if you’re not sure, we can help you get clear on that too). Just reach out for a breakthrough session (it’s free) here: www.violetlange.com/apply or contact my assistant Elizabeth at [email protected] to get on our calendar.
P.P.S. – sorry for the swearing in this one, I just get fired up by what’s possible and how to win in love!
